it would have been better

We found a dog today, driving home from school ( us, not the dog ) .
She was lost, alone, coldd ... three streets down .
Stopped . Asked around . No one knew .
A part of me wished she would be Chewy's ..
Took her to neighbors' for a leash .
Ben came along, we asked around .
A cell phone, a kind heart, and determination .
What more do you need ?
The thought struck me, not suddenly,
but came over me gradually .
I felt myself counting the houses
as we traced our path back down the street,
secretly anticipating that home of unfinished memories .
We came . We saw . We left .
Her brother answered the door .. no clue .
Seemed like a really nice guy, though .
No relief, no delight, no moment of pretended surprise .
No meeting, realization, shaking of hands .
He wished us luck .
A few minutes later, the owner came rushing up to us .
We turned around .
She looked exasperated .
She thanked us, apologized, returned to her car .
I called and reported the good news .
And yet deep inside, I was hoping it would have been better .

i expect her to love me back ..

" Why do you always expect things back ? "
Good . Point . But how can you blame me ?
I think, oftentimes in life .. like, OFTEN x .. we all expect things in return .
In fact, I think there is nothing anyone will do
( and strong words, I know .. but I truly mean it )
without expecting to receive something in return .
When you love someone, you expect her to love you back .
When you do someone a favor, you expect her to be gracious .
When you lend something out, you expect to get it back .
When you make a random comment, you expect to be laughed at .
There are, of course, some things you do without thinking ..
they are called impulses . BUT .. those don't count .
And if, just to be spiteful, you do something for no point to prove me wrong ..
you are expecting me to be proven wrong .
So either way, I win . Ha ! Get used to it . I will have my way ..
Like Handson said, art is all about intent and purpose .
And life is a masterpiece .
Therefore all actions we take have both an intent and a purpose .
Although I am not entirely sure what the difference is .. Tundra !
Aah .. lmfbo . Intent is " the purpose of something that is intended . "
Purpose is " a result that is desired; an intention . "
Uuh, ohkay ! I feel the connection .

[ I've got it ! Intent is what you want to happen .
Purpose is what you need to happen .
Think about it . ]

" There were so many questions he wanted to ask,
but he had been told often that he asked too many questions . "
~ Paul Anderson ~

Think about it . Think, think about it .

a sincerely efficient medicine

A Search For an ALternative to Thinking
( Asfalt ) : The Trials

[ Started the 15th night of November .. d@mn .
Like I said, I have other business . ]

As you may recall ( or may not, as I realize it was quite a long while ago now ), on September 20th I began my search - and two days later, became aware that not everything is possible . And now, I will strive to find some answers - beginning with the easy ones . Be sure to read the Research first, or else none of this will make much sense ( as if it would anyway ) .

Firstly, it is important to remember not only what I am striving to do, but also why I want to find an alternative to thinking . It is not that I think thinking is bad or wrong; I strongly believe in it . But too much thinking can be bad for you - can give you a headache . That is why I am looking for one . One being not a headache, but an alternative, essentially to headaches .

Now, I know one simple antidote that seems to work rather well .. although it may not be the best solution . It appears to be the case that one's body can only handle a certain amount of pain at one time - so simply diverting your own mind by applying pain to some other part of your body should temporarily take most of the pain away from your head . This works with anything, really . Earaches, stomachaches, heartaches .. I find that any kind of ache is not really too enjoyable . Pick your poison . Mind over matter - the placebo effect .. a sincerely efficient medicine .

But I think it would be much more valuable if a method could be found to actually relieve the pain of a headache .. Medicine is dandy, rubbing your temples .. Those are all fine ideas; but you know me, I won't settle for less . Naturally, I looked to the source, the cause of the effect, and concluded that a headache could be prevented by not thinking so hard in the first place . Naturally, this is oftentimes extremely difficult; as thoughts can overcome you, practically consume you ..

" And this new Feeling would emerge inside of us, And we would not understand what It was, But we would find that It was powerful. And It would overcome us. "
~ excerpt from Feelings ~

But the fastest way to the finish line is often through a shortcut . The best way is an indirect one . So here I am, ... dangit, I don't even know what I am doing . Ahahha . But I'll do it anyway .. I just warn you, with something like this it is hard to be logically concise and organized, and present the facts in a clean and orderly manner, as would normally be the preference for most anyone .. So I will probably end up skipping around and leaving loose ends untied .

Soo collectively,
we have
as supposed alternatives to thinking :
* not thinking
* blogging
* mental paralysis
* thinking outside the circle
* Intuita
* buttons
* binary logic
* faith in God
* stupidity
* watching television

Not thinking is seemingly the most plain and simple one, but actually one of the most complex . You can't just not think . The closest you could actually get to this would be something like meditation, nirvana, or shefa . Blogging, at least the way I do it ( although I know I have a much different approach to it all ), cannot stop you from thinking, but it is a very good way to organize your thoughts, to get them out there when it is in other manners difficult . What does paralysis mean ? In pathology ( in medicine, " the study of the nature of disease " ), " a condition where the sufferer loses voluntary control of part of their body, such as [ your mind ] .. " Soo, mental paralysis is a fancy way to say " losing your mind . " Like shefa .. Why do I keep on mentioning shefa ? Because I saw Bee Season . Faith in God certainly is an alternative to thinking; but I would not like to stop thinking altogether .. Stupidity has an obvious technical flaw : it is plainly impractical . Television ? There it is in bold, capital letters : " eye strain headache from watching television . " " How to keep people from pushing your buttons " ? " No one can make you feel inferior without your consent . " ~ Eleanor Roosevelt ~

" Nicolescu calls on us to rethink everything in terms of what quantum physics has shown us about the nature of the universe . Besides offering an alternative to thinking exclusively in terms of binary logic, and showing how the idea of the logic of the included middle can afford hitherto unimagined possibilities, he also introduces us to the idea that Reality is not something that exists on only one level, but on many, and maintains that only transdisciplinarity can deal with the dynamics engendered by the action of several levels of Reality at once . " ~ two sentences ~ And rather interesting . But what a shame, I do not know quantum physics .. and at the moment, am not particularly willing to learn . Intuita and the circle thing just seem like a waste of time .. which apparently is what this entire fiasco is turning out to be .

* Sigh * The evidence points to Brad and Ted being the most factually accurate . But I really am interested in that shefa thing ( from now on I will not italicize it, for simplicity's sake ), and believe I may have the capabilities . From what I have seen on Bee Season, the term's embodiment in a movie, the capabilities are rebelliousness, creepiness, and random spasms and anxiety attacks . I show signs of all the symptoms ! My history of semilucid dreams may help as well .

A search for " shefa " on Google ( of course ) yields even more results than my previous search : 171,000 . A lot of them, though, appeared to be decoys . Fortunately, I needed only go through six to find the shefa weblog : " psychology and the technology of thought . " ( " How can you upgrade your feelings ? " ) The only real problem is that it is all in the wrong language . YAY !! This does not look like an efficiently worthy priority . But please, definitely take into consideration what I said at the beginning .

Divert the pain, buddy .

the darkest of darknesses

[ Finally finished this on Monday;
I have had the beginning for a few months ]

I see the darkest of darknesses, and the shroud of night approaches .
And all I can think of is what I would do without you .
Without your wit, without your smile,
without that hope you give me every once in a while .
If I had to sit here in the dark alone, with everyone gone all around me;
and no one to ask what I'm doing here, no one to wonder about me;
I would die inside . My stomach would drop, my heart would fall and break .
Fragile, shatter to the ground, like a crystal .
A crystal with all of its faces and obscure, perfectly formed angles;
like your body . A crystal, a jewel, a gem; so beautifully magnificent,
so wonderfully properly out of my league . But I love it .
The shine of your eyes, like two glimmering orbs,
refracting the light of the sun, changing it, turning it,
into something more beautiful, something worthy of you,
of your glow, of the aura that follows wherever you go .
When you walk, flawless, grace redefined,
when you reach out with hands, a delight to hold in mine .
Your hips, your lips, like bittersweet wine, an oasis,
a place to spend unscheduled time . You're so fine;
when the darkest of darknesses come, and the shroud of night approaches,
I thank God I met you . And all I can think of is what I would do without you .

and now you are convinced

" Shoulder Pad "
by Ghostbust
( approx . 2:30;
written a week ago )

[ Verse 1 ]
You saw her and you realized what you'd missed
You sat by her when you both had detention
She looked your way, it started with a glimpse
And now you realize that it should never end

[ Chorus 1 ]
When everything is going to the pits
When no one cares to pay any attention
Anytime your life is on the fritz
Just call on me and I will be your shoulder pad

[ Verse 2 ]
You talk to her, but does she listen in ?
You're afraid of what she thinks, of how it might end up
You know that you'll regret it once you're in
Later on, you'll feel a failure when your heart gives in

[ Chorus 2 ]
When all she ever thinks about is him
He wins first, you're stuck with honorable mention
Incapable of acting on a whim
Just give the word and I will be your shoulder pad

[ Bridge ]
In a pickle, with no one to help you out, to lend a hand
But extend yours, I will always be your shoulder pad

[ Outro ]
She looked your way, it started with a glimpse
And now you are convinced that it should never end

if i did like no other grrl

" Like No Other "
by Ghostbust
( approx . 3:45;
written the past two days )

[ Verse 1 ]
I see you in the distance
Envisioning a perfect fate for us
False hopes and wishful thinking
Will never end up doing much
I've noticed something missing
I know there's something you can do

[ Chorus 1 ]
But when I stand alone before you
There's something standing in our way
And maybe, you just never were the one
That was meant for me, but I know
This feeling's like no other

[ Verse 2 ]
Beyond the looks deceiving
A glimpse of something underneath
So 1nnocently seeming
I know there's something more to this
But what could you possibly be thinking ?
Is this about the way our eyes meet ?

[ Chorus 2 ]
When I see you alone in the corner
There's something standing in our way
And maybe, you just never were the one
That was meant for me, but I know
This feeling's like no other

[ Verse 3 ]
Upon passing in the hallway
Not settling for any less
Misinterpreting a stalling
Shoulders rub, was that an acc1dent ?
I wonder why you're waiting
Could this be what love is all about ?

[ Chorus 3 ]
'Cos when you're all alone
I get the urge to go up to you
To comfort you, to hold you
But I find myself just so caught up
On what you might think if I did
If I did, if I did like no other grrl

to be with you just one time

{ Formal starts in a mere three hours ..
And what am I thinking ? }

" I Want You "
by Ghostbust
( approx . 4:30;
written a week ago )

[ Intro ]
Grrl, I just don't know how else to say this;
but, I want you .

[ Verse 1 ]
When you look up at me
through glittery eyes and smile,
I see the moon, the stars, the sky,
lose myself for a while .
Your laugh is unforgettable;
your voice is unbelievably splendid .
When did you ever frown ?
I can't remember a time;
you're so sublime .
If only you could be mine .
Given the circumstances,
exchanging nervous glances .
I'll take the biggest chances .
I know I want to, but do you ?

[ Chorus 1 ]
I want you .
- I want your lips to settle
remarkably in mine, to fit together .
I want to taste your juicy skin .
- I want your heart to meddle
in my business;
to be with you just one time .
- I want your hips to nestle
in the hollow of my arm;
to carry the burden of your mind .
- I want to start by telling you
to what extent I love you;
because above you,
there's a golden angel's halo .

[ Verse 2 ]
Unbelievably splendid .
When did you ever frown ?
I can't remember a time;
you're so sublime .
If only you could be mine .
Given the circumstances,
attending romantic dances .
I'll take the biggest chances .
I know I want to, but do you ?

[ Chorus 2 ]
I want you .
- I want your lips to settle
remarkably on mine .
To stick together,
the greatest of my wishes .
- I want your heart to meddle
in my business;
to be with you just one time .
- I want your hips to nestle
in the hollow of my arm;
to carry the burden of your soul .
- I want to start by telling you
to what extent I love you;
because above you,
there's a golden angel's halo .

[ Outro ]
I won't go so far so as to say I love you,
but I know for a fact, bright as day,
I want you .
I want your eyes
I want your smile
I want your voice
I want your laugh
I want your lips
I want your skin
I want your hips
I want your soul
I want your mind
I want your heart
I want your body
I want your curves
I want your secrets
I want this dance
I want you .

{ It would mean the world . }

a few inspiring tidbits

Tying up the knot and building a foundation ..

" I don't think you can be with someone,
until you can be with yourself . "
~ Summer, The O.C. ~

" God, I wish there was a pill to protect your heart . "
~ Susan, Desperate Housewives ~

" the most brilliant shade of Red "
= incarnadine .

A few thoughts from the end of November :

If there is a God,
he really wants to give me a hard time .

I'm tired of having to hide and sneak around
to do what is right .

I watched Cars ..
A particularly good one . Moral values, romance .. everything you need . Go, learn a lesson . I loved it . But then again, I say that about everything I watch .. I wouldn't have seen them, otherwise ?

" Live as you wish your kids would . " and
" A hard part about business is minding your own . "
~ Valencia Inn ~

" Ideas won't work unless you do . " and
" If the going gets easy, you may be going downhill . "
~ El Dorado Inn ~

Take your pick . I've got more .

between you and me ...

I saw the license plate
4MOR143 . ( amor, I love you )
Dood, what are the chances !?

There is a fine line between confidence and closed-mindedness, as between being unsure and being open-minded . There is a fine line between courage and stupidity . Between fear and wisdom, between fright and conscience; between fear and fright . Between relaxation and sloth . Between love and 1ust . Between envy and admiration; between envy and hatred . Between my heart and yours .

Parallel structure . Although, I have noticed I often try to be as unbalanced as possible without being incorrect . I admit I have crossed the fine line at least a few times .

~~~~~

I have a theory, that optimists like Monopoly more than pessimists . And it makes perfect sense . * People * complain that Monopoly - the greatest game in the world - is no fun because it takes too long . In the process of trying to prove this wrong, I realized that the second half of the game sure is a lot more fun than the first half, which is more chance than skill . And if one is impatient ( and / or a pessimist ), she will stop in the middle and never get to experience the fun of the real core of the game . The patient ones ( and / or the optimists ) continue to play through the whole of the game, and discover how fun it really can be .

People do not like Monopoly because the metaphor is so grand, because it is soo much like Life . Er ... life, sorry . The thing you live; not the game or the cereal . They are similar in that : If you just sit around and refuse to pay attention until it is your turn, you will miss something and bore yourself .. or worse yet, lose . But if you get into it, and be excited about it, and speed quickly through all the events, taking your time, of course, when it is needed, you will make it more interesting and you will enjoy yourself .

~~~~~

I wrote a poem known as " The Bitter Truth . " Naught but a few days later, I heard word ( more like read word [ Current Events ] ) that Snicket is writing a book known as " Horseradish : Bitter Truths You Can't Avoid . " Coincidence ? I think not . Bitter( sweet ) has come to be an important word in my syntax .
It keeps on turning up .. * heit * heit * Why does she repeat it ? The definitions of > bitter < . versus . Bittersweet is not the same thing !

reconstructing my platypus

Reconsidering my stance on life ..
Rethinking my intent ..
Redefining my purpose ..
Reconstructing my platypus ..

See, when I was looking for the Z chromosome ( see one of the links above ), I thought that the two systems, ZW and XY, are always separate . But Shrapnel has informed me now that it may sometimes be otherwise ( Chromosomal determination : ZW chromosomes ) . " A paper published in 2004 ... suggests that the two systems may be related . " " Chromosomes in the ZW region in birds are autosomal in mammals, and vice-versa; therefore, it is theorized that the ZW and XY couples come from different chromosomes of the common ancestor .... According to the paper, platypuses [ not platypi ] have a ten-chromosome-based system, where the chromosomes form a multivalent chain in male meiosis, segregating into XXeksXX-sperm and YYYYY-sperm, with XY-equivalent chromosomes at one end of this chain and ZW-equivalent chromosomes at the other end . "

You get all that ? Reread it, and more carefully this time .
Platypoda, one of only five species of mammals that lay eggs ( monotremes ), the other four all being echidna . That funny-looking creature with the duck-bill and the beaver-tail . It lives only on the east shore of Australia ( my fave country, as it happens ), in and out of water, and appears on one of their coins even . It apparently has a venomous hind foot ( a fact which I did not know prior ) . With all its awkward, bizarre features, it should not come as a surprise that this bird-like mammal would prove as a scientific link .

Who are they, really ?
I have said it before, and I will say it again : the embodiment of karma .

to think, or not to think .. that is the cliche`

I think .. in case you were wondering .
[ Double meaning, yayy ]

How do I do it ?
Soo much ?
Frankly ( to be honest ) :
A lot of it is planned;
a lot of it is random .
A lot of it is important;
a lot of it is just because .
A lot of it is organized, carefully;
a lot of it has no place .
A lot of it is rant and rave;
a lot of it is wants and love .
A lot of it is elated wonder;
a lot of it is dates and numbers .

I love the sound of pencil on paper ..
And the feel
And the smell
And the sight
And aw heck, the taste too .

" Ain't got no cash, ain't got no style ..
Ain't got no grrl to make you smile ..
But don't worry, be happy .
'Cos when you worry, your face will frown;
and that will bring everybody down . "
~ Don't Worry, Be Happy - Bobby McFerrin ~

to establish myself for life ... as a Pinoy

Ever since I started to have friends, in Kindergarten, to make my friends, to establish myself for life, they have been Pinoy . And I have no intentions of changing that . I guess I just get a little overconfident sometimes ..

" Maybe it's not right, I have a grrlfriend ..
I made a friend tonight, who is a grrl and ..
I just wanted to talk to you, but then I started wondering
if she's the one .. or not . "
~ A Little Doubt Goes a Long Way - Reel Big Fish ~
" I gotta go, gotta go .. before I do something stupid .
I GOTTA GO !
I gotta go, gotta go .. before I do something lame . "

Too late ?

" You don't want anyone to know you . Nobody does . We all want our mystery; our own and everyone else's . "
" Someone who waits on nothings, on tomorrows that never come . "
~ Upstairs Downstairs ~

Am I hard to understand ? Is this ?
I try very hard not to be wrong .
And I try not to waste any time .

1 gal ... Jan 17 .
No coincidence .

A little dirty .. but hilarious .

My appendix is cramping up again ..

Is it a bad time ?

Her fiasco with the debate boy really makes me wonder why I am not even able to connect with the grrl around the corner .

I do a whole lot of thinking . It's just that the majority of it is done alone .

Epiphany, part 3 : renewal

I always knew I was meant for something better . I want to leave my mark on the world, and I want it to scar .

Now that I have celebrated the past, it is time to mourn over the present .

My New Year's Resolutions ( or Revolutions, if you prefer .. * cough * Rona * .. ) are basically the same as last year's, but updated just a little :
1. To keep my Resolutions . ( A little extra motivation )
2. To not screw anything up this year ( more than it already is as such ) .
3. To revisit my days with Lenna ( with Bixy ) .
4. To get a 4.0 ! ( Shouldn't be too hard this year )
5. To sleep less ( than 12 hours a day ) .
6. To finish my blog . ( When ? That a secret )
7. To face my fears ( in a manner of speaking ) .
8. To develop a System . ( I'm not yet sure what that means exactly .. but It came to me in a dream )
9. To read a Chapter a day ( every day !! )
10. To watch less television .
11. To leave / make more time for writing ( for at no point can you ever have written too much ) .
12. To be more confident ( per his advice, and hers ) .

I am ashamed to say that, although I got off to a good start, I did not manage to follow through with any of my goals last year . This year will definitely be different .

" It's hard to beat the system,
when we're standing at a distance .
So we keep waiting on the world to change . "
~ Waiting on the World to Change - John Mayer ~

I need to read the book first .

Epiphany, part 2 : review

" It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers . "
~ James Thurber ~

" Better sore feet than shabby boots . "
~ Upstairs Downstairs ~

Look at me, 3 and 4 days after it has already passed and I am still going on about Epiphany .

[ By the way : Tundra defines epiphany as " a manifestation or appearance of a divine or superhuman being " or " an illuminating discovery often resulting in a personal feeling of elation . " The latter is what Smee meant . Theophany is " a visible manifestation of a deity [ the essential nature of a god, divinity ] . " Makes sense; so they are virtually the same thing, just the latter is more religious ( hence the theo- prefix ) . This favourite word ' manifestation ' means " the act or process of becoming manifest [ evident to the senses, apparent ] . " And apparently the Magi represent the world . Thank you . ]

2006 was such a good year;
I don't want to leave it .
My entire Life was defined by This Year ..
I can't just let it pass right by !
Hence, here is a memoriam :

2006; an Overview : a Brainstorm of 17 Memories
A beating heart that never stops
A dance proposal turned down
A crush that went awry
A thousand apologies unaccepted
A grade insufficient
A punishment for the better
A shocking realization
A painful blast from the past
A vocabulary increased
A summer spent in bed
A mystery grrl whom I will never see again
A dream that made me reconsider
A race I could never win ( over )
A feat unaccomplished
A game to keep the flow
A buddy that finally understands
A purpose personified

[ And lucky charms ..
Oh wait, that was eighth grade .
My fault . ]

Epiphany, part 1 : religion

" I've just had an apostrophe ! "
~ Smee, Hook ~

( To make it clear; yes, Epiphany was yesterday .. But I have been caught up in other business for the past few days . So I had to wait . )

A Hangover quote from Joan of Arcadia :
" Our job as artists is to press on, continue creating, 'cos that's who we are .
Even if some critic does crush you like a bug .., that's who we are . "
~ Umm .. Joan's mom ? ~

I didn't say anything, because
I didn't have anything to say .
Now I do .

" In the Western church, Epiphany is usually celebrated as the time the Wise Men or Magi arrived to present gifts to the young Jesus .... Traditionally there were three Magi, probably from the fact of three gifts, even though the biblical narrative never says how many Magi came .... Since Eastern Orthodox traditions use a different religious calendar, they celebrate Christmas on January 7th and observe Epiphany or Theophany on January 19th ....

" The Twelfth Night [ like Shakespeare ] is January 5th, the last day of the Christmas Season before Epiphany ( January 6th ) . In some church traditions, January 5th is considered the eleventh Day of Christmas, while the evening of January 5th is still counted as the Twelfth Night, the beginning of the Twelfth day of Christmas the following day ....

" The popular song ' The Twelve Days of Christmas ' is usually seen as simply a nonsense song for children . However, some have suggested that it is a song of Christian instruction dating to the 16th century religious wars in England, with hidden references to the basic teachings of the Faith . They contend that it was a mnemonic device to teach the catechism to youngsters . The ' true love ' mentioned in the song is not an earthly suitor, but refers to God Himself . The ' me ' who receives the presents refers to every baptized person who is part of the Christian Faith . Each of the ' days ' represents some aspect of the Christian Faith that was important for children to learn . "

I was actually going to talk about true love . Come on people, there is no such thing . At least not that should concern you, anyway . True love is pure love, and pure love cannot be reached by any mere human, because there will always be other thoughts and feelings in your mind, in your heart, whatever you choose to believe . You cannot get there; you can only get very close . It is like an asymptote !!

sorry guys, i failed you (again?)

I hope my voice will return before school happens ..

On the twelfth day of Christmas ( yesterday =\ ), my true love gave to me :

12 ... drummers drumming .
Now, wouldn't that be annoying ?
The twelve points of doctrine in the Apostles' Creed . Ooh, a test !!
( Oh by the way, an apostle is " one sent as an envoy or messenger ," while a disciple is " a person who learns from another, especially one who then teaches others, " or " an active follower or adherent . " Apparently these twelve, as well as Paul and Barnabas, are both . )
1) I believe in God, the Father almighty, creator of heaven and earth . NO
2) I believe in Jesus Christ, his only Son, our Lord . NO
3) He was conceived by the power of the Holy Spirit and born of the virgin Mary . ( Really ? I never knew that part . Let's see .. Conceive means " to develop an idea, " " to understand someone, " or " to become pregant . "I wonder how that worked out with linguists .. ) NO
4) He suffered under Pontius Pilate ( wtf ? ), was crucified, died, and was buried . He descended into he11 [ the grave ] . ( Umm .. ) NO
5) On the third day he rose again . He ascended into heaven, and is seated at the right hand of the Father . ( Aww, how sweet . ) NO
6) He will come again to judge the living and the de@d . (Well, that ought to take a while ) NO
7) I believe in the Holy Spirit, YES ! ( Maybe not yours, but .. )
8) the holy Catholic Church, YES ( Well yea, I pass by it every day )
9) the communion of saints, ( Let's see .. A communion is a joining together of minds or spirits . ) NO
10) the forgiveness of sins, YES
11) the resurrection of the body, NO ( not particularly )
12) and life everlasting . YES ( in a manner of speaking )

Soo what, did I fail ?
4 out of 12 ... that's 30 %
Sorry guys, I just don't buy it .

Come back !

5 out of 8 isn't bad

On the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me :

8 ... maids a-milking .
Ah, so this now is when I start receiving people as presents .
That's not creepy at all, thanks .
The milkwomen ( although that may not be the most proper term, seeing as milkmen deliver the milk, not extract it ) represent the eight Beatitudes .
I'm lost already .

A beatitude ( pronunciation ? ), according to Tundra, is a " supreme, utmost bliss and happiness . " Well, that sounds pleasant enough . These eight say, " Blessed are the poor in spirit, those who mourn, the meek, those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, the merciful, the pure in heart, the peacemakers, and those who are persecuted for righteousness' sake . " ( Meek means " humble, modest, meager, or self-effacing; " or " submissive, despirited, or of broken will . " ) Persecute, eh ? OH, I see ! " To pursue in a manner to injure, grieve, or afflict; to beset with cruelty or malignity; to harass; especially, to afflict, harass, punish, or put to , for adherence to a particular religious creed or mode of worship . " OR " to harass with importunity; to pursue with persistent solicitations; to annoy . " Didn't want to miss a beat, did they ? ( Importunity is " a constant and insistent demand for a favour . " ) Okay then, what's prosecute ? " To start civil or criminal proceedings against someone " or " to pursue something to the bitter end . " Really now, it's hard for me to see a difference - except that one definition is longer and therefore complicates and confuses things just a bit .

I would say I am blessed by the 2nd, 4th, 5th, 6th, and the 7th . The 3rd, I am not sure .. because there are two definitions for meek, and they seem to mean the complete opposite . " Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth . " I may be the first, but not the second ( meek, not Beatitude ) . The 1st ( Beatitude, not meek ) is just a pity statement, and the 8th just confuses me . But either way, 5 out of 8 isn't bad . Let's move on ..

9 ... ladies dancing .
Yippee ! Now that's a present .
Lawl . These represent the nine Fruit of the Holy Spirit .
AH, so It has seven gifts ( see swans a-swimming ), and nine Fruit(s) as well .
They are : love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control . Well, they just get longer as you go, don't they ?
Fruit is yummy .
Yum !

10 ... lords a-leaping .
Wth is the point of that ??
The Ten Commandments .
Everybody knows those,
so I'm'a pass on this'un .

11 ... pipers piping .
The eleven Faithful Apostles : Simon Peter, Andrew, James, John, Philip, Bartholomew, Matthew, Thomas, James bar Alphaeus, Simon the Zealot, and Judas bar James . No offense; what boring names . " The list does not include the twelfth disciple, Judas Iscariot, who betrayed Jesus to the religious leaders and the Romans . " OOHH .. burned !! Wait, disciple ?? I thought they were called Apostles ..

But either way, 11 out of 12 isn't bad .

things are guna change so fast

I like to do things in a hurry; I don't like to be hurried .
I have a 2006 hangover, and don't think it will end until Epiphany .
Hold tight .

Hangover quotes from Frankenstein ( SocraSem ):

" How can you seclude yourself in this area, when you know there is so much more ? "

" In any situation where someone suffers, you can't just blame one person . "

" Everyone in this world has a flaw; and they should just be happy and be bold about it . "

" My organs were indeed harsh, but supple; and although my voice was very unlike the soft music of their tones, yet I pronounced such words as I understood with tolerable ease . It was as the @ss and the lap-dog; yet surely the gentle @ss whose intentions were affectionate, although his manners were rude, deserved better treatment than blows and execration . " ~ 119, the last page of Ch. 12 ~

What he's saying is, it's the thought that counts .

" Where should we be if we never looked for what lies beyond ? " ~ the movie ~

" When you guna make up your mind ? When you guna love you as much as I do ? When you guna make up your mind ? 'Cos things are guna change so fast . " ~ Winter - Tori Amos ~

Three queens ..
I do believe in numbers !
I think I can I think I can

Aw shnap, my parientes are stocking me ..
Why not just ki|| me now
[ EDIT : That wasn't meant to be taken literally .
It's just hard to express such a deep hatred .
Myfugah .. ]

Things are guna change so fast ..
When the ball dropped and everyone cheered, I happened to look over and see your picture hanging on my wall .. And it made me wonder .