ever wondered what goes through my head ?

[ i put no thought into this whatsoever ..
except nothing but thought .
lol, how ironic . i didn't edit it i mean,
or plan it out at all ]

( setting : april 3rd . 9:48 pm )
i am strong enough ..
i am strong enough ..
i am strong enough
i am strong enough
NO .. i am stronger than strong !!
i am a tiger .
tiger
tigerrrrr
bite my dust
damnit ..
stop changing the tab you !!
accept it
she isn't there
she wouldn't care anyway
hells no
tigers don't give up
wtf .. what kind of reverse psychology is this
the urrge
it kills me
hold it in keep it in
contain it
containment
damn homework .. don't remind me
you're a tiger .
she means nothing
she is just another grrl
just another lioness
look for someone more your species
OMG i did it again
maybe i should do homework ..
no even that doesn't work
nothing can keep my mind offf
awayy away !!
the hardest thing is to forget .
it is easy to remember
i've got that down pat
forget .. forget .. forgettt it
forgotten . she's forgotten
oh yes . of course
she is in the past
i am over her already
i was over her a long time ago
frikin ay .. i never truly liked her to begin with
shizzz i DID !!
i can't even convince myself
for one second ..
once second
okay let's go
you can do this
one second
that's all it takes
and then i'll be happy
.. but how do you tell ?
how do you tell if you aren't thinking about her,
if you aren't thinking about her ?
i'm sure there have already been many secondes without her
but they are overwhelmed immediately
it's like sleepy dreamming
you don't remember sleeping
just falling asleep and waking up
falling .. asleep .. and waking up
from this nightmare
" will i lose my dignity ?
will someone care ? "
~ will i ? ~
okay . from now on every time
you click that button
hurt yourself
hurt youselff
okay
sitting
waiting
not much going through my head
that mouse is looking really rather friendly
freindly
mmmm
touch it
touch it
click it
she's there
she has something to tell you
NO !! wth is that gibberish
i don't know what you're talking about
who's there ? who what ?
what's that you say ?
i never met her in my life
what an odd name anyhow
NO you did it
you loooser !!
hurt yourself now
hurt youselff
damnn .. how suicidal of me
hey . you know what ?
close the window .
close it okay
Xx .. x . x . click the x
X ! there . you did it
for the love of gahd, you did it
you should feel good about yourself
( the next day )
feel good about myself ..
screw that
how long is this going to go on ?
i'm not sure .
i'm sure i'll find a stopping point somewhere
Ouch .. hurt myself again
all right
that's enough
this is sillly
horrible .. horible !!
but it all means nothing compared to the pain
i feel for you today
gahd i'm so repetitititive
oucH !
you're such an idiot, you know that
you should feel bad about yourslef
BAD !! soo bad
bad bad bad bababadddd
you know what ? eat me
i don't care
shi
shiiii
i can't
breathe
okay
i'm done
good night .. or
whatever time of day this is
just
good bye .
NO
good bah . what
what
wth am i thinkingg
this was stupid as welll
i promise
i prommise i will
what ? will what ?
will . i just will
hakuna matatata ta ta