love is what I know, love is what I'll call it .

Why are her posts
always filled with questions ?

Where is this sudden inspiration
coming from ?

What makes these feelings
flow, flutter, fly, so fleetingly ?

How does one second
work miracles on the heart ?

How can one instant
conjure up such magic ?

What is it called ?
Or does it have a name ?

Try love .

Love is what I know,
love is what I'll call it .

But how am I so sure ?
I said the same thing once before,
concerning another 17 .

How can I consider myself
strong, when picturing her
makes me weak ?

Why must I make myself
feel the guilt
of being so quick to blink ?

Blink, to be sure
that my wildest dreams
really have come true .

Living in a dream
may not be the most moral manner,
but it sure feels good .

Good ? An understatement,
of course . But I could go on
for a lifetime listing synonyms .

I might as well,
for I will need to wait a lifetime
for the time of my life .

Why, when I try to keep it simple,
does it only continue to become
more and more complicated ?

In truth, I am not really trying .
I can't help but listen,
when everything I live for
is telling me to change
the very core of who I am .

And yet I can't .
At least not yet .
I can't,
physically,
mentally,
socially,
or emotionally .

I can't do any more
than keep walking
home .

My throat dries up,
and my eyes
divert themselves
in a sudden euphoria,
an instantaneous,
spontaneous,
momentous rush
of ecst4sy .

Is it
for better,
or for worse ?

And yet I can't
settle down, either .
There is no way
I can calm
the stirrings
that dwell halcyonically
in my soul .